Dealing with the holidays after a divorce can be challenging. Thanksgiving is often a time for family get-togethers and celebrations. If you are unsure of how to approach Thanksgiving this year, here are some helpful hints that could prove useful in finding a new way forward for you and your former spouse.
Put Your Children’s Welfare First
If you and your former partner have children, it is important to consider their feelings and their wishes when planning for Thanksgiving. Children may want to spend time with extended family members from both sides of the family, including grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins.
By working together with your former partner, you may be able to provide time for your children with your own family as well as with the extended family of your former spouse. This can make co-parenting much easier on both of you and can help your children achieve a valuable sense of stability after a divorce.
Remember to Be Flexible
After a divorce, you can expect some changes in the way you celebrate Thanksgiving at home or with family. If you are sharing custody of one or more children with your former spouse, you may need to exercise some flexibility on timing, scheduling, and custody arrangements during this time. By being willing to compromise, you can build a solid foundation for future cooperation when you need a little extra flexibility for your own activities.
Take Time Out for Yourself
It may seem tempting to take on all the responsibilities of Thanksgiving by yourself that you once handled as a couple. This is a mistake, however, that could take some of the joy out of the holiday for you and those around you. Before carving the traditional turkey, be sure to carve out some time for yourself to relax and enjoy the season. This can help you have a more joyous attitude when dealing with Thanksgiving and the start of the holiday season.
Consider an Even Split
One of the trickiest areas for divorced couples to navigate is the way in which holiday custody arrangements should be handled. If possible and practical, you can extend your Thanksgiving celebration over a longer period by assigning the day before and half the day of Thanksgiving to one parent and their family and providing custody to the other parent during the second half of Thanksgiving Day and the Friday following. If you are unable to easily divide time due to distance, you can alternate so that each parent gets all of Thanksgiving day in alternating years. It is important to come to an arrangement that will work for you, your children, your former spouse, and your work requirements. This can help you and your children enjoy the most joyous Thanksgiving even after your divorce is final.
Remember to Give Thanks
In the aftermath of a divorce, it can sometimes be difficult to achieve a grateful attitude. Making a list of things for which you are thankful and sharing it with friends and loved ones is a wonderful way to celebrate Thanksgiving. By demonstrating the reason for the season, you can also model positive behavior for your children during this festive time of year.
Planning ahead for the Thanksgiving holiday can help you and your children enjoy this day in the spirit of gratitude and togetherness. This can make Thanksgiving Day something special after a divorce.