Making sure that your child is emotionally healthy during and after your divorce can give them the best possible start later in life. While some stress may be natural during the divorce process, you can take some steps to lessen the impact on your child. Here are some helpful hints to ease the transition and to provide support when dealing with children and divorce.
Be Honest
While not every detail of your divorce should be shared with your children, being as open and honest as possible can help your children feel more confident about the process. By keeping your children in the loop about the progress of your divorce and future plans, you can provide them with added confidence and security during this difficult process.
Avoid Negativity
Maintaining a positive attitude can sometimes be difficult for divorcing parents, but it is important to overcome issues for the greater good of both you and your children. Making an effort to stay focused on happier subjects can produce a more peaceful environment at home. It is important to remember that your cheerful attitude can rub off on your children and can help them look forward to the future with a more optimistic perspective.
Minimize Disruptions
After your divorce, you may need to change your living arrangements. If possible, try and delay these big changes until after the end of the school year. Finding a way to help your child maintain normalcy during and after your divorce can pay off in improved academic performance and increased comfort levels for your children.
Make Time to Play
Setting aside some time for family fun can help children maintain a sunny outlook even during a difficult divorce. Kids need something to look forward to and a chance to expend some of their abundant energy in active play. By making sure that your children enjoy opportunities to express themselves creatively in a relaxed and enjoyable environment, you can reduce the stress associated with children and divorce.
Share Parenting Duties
It may not always be possible to share parenting responsibilities with your former spouse, especially if abuse or drug use were factors in your divorce. If you and your former partner have remained on relatively good terms, you should share in the everyday duties of parenting to reduce the pressure on both of you.
Be Prepared for Tears
Even the most amicable divorces can be hard for children to accept and understand. Taking tears and tantrums in stride can allow younger children to feel more confident that they are still loved. Older children may have a lot of questions about the future. By listening to them and responding as completely and truthfully as possible, you may be able to alleviate some of their fears about the divorce process.
Enlist Some Help
Alerting school counselors and teachers to your situation can sometimes expand the safety net for children. Unless abuse or risk to your child is involved, you usually do not need to share details about your divorce proceedings with these educational professionals. Providing them with a heads-up that your child may be under additional stress is usually enough to achieve the results you need.
By staying calm and positive throughout the process, you can support your children during and after your divorce. This can help your family weather this temporary storm and achieve the best possible outcomes when dealing with children and divorce.